The struggle is real, but totally worth it. UC Irvine head women's volleyball coach Ashlie Hain is the mother to two young boys (Lincoln 5; Lucas 1) as well as a mentor and pseudo-mom to 16 student-athletes.

"I think I provide the tough love our players need some times as I'm always pushing them to be their best selves, whether it is in volleyball or academics. On the other hand, we are also that support system. We care about every part of their lives and check in with them every day. We can tell if something doesn't seem right. Those moments aren't usually volleyball related so we follow up and get them through. We have so many positive things we celebrate and life experiences we share together. There are ups and downs, but it's about supporting them through it all which is what you do as a mom." 

Hain thinks that being a mom herself might not be something they discuss directly, but seeing her example is a life lesson the players take away.

"I think seeing me as a mom gives them a bigger picture of the future. You can be a mom and be able to work in a challenging profession. While it is imperfect at times, you can find a way to balance it and I hope that is a take away for them."

Hain admits that part of the year she spends more time with her team than her family. It's hard to balance your real family with matches, time on the road, practice, film and recruiting.

"You can't do it yourself. I'm so lucky to have a support system. As a mother you can feel like you are failing at times because you may be pulled in different directions, but I feel like my life is so enriched with all the people I love, whether it is the boys or the girls. I have tried really hard to be in the moment with whomever I'm with and focus on being there, like not having the phone when I'm playing with my boys."

Hain has called UCI home since 2001 when she stepped on campus as a member of the women's volleyball team. She went on to lead the Anteaters to back-to-back NCAA appearances in 2003 and 2004.

Hain graduated cum laude from UCI with a B.S. in psychology and a minor in management and after a professional playing career began coaching at Moorpark College in 2007 then on to American River College in 2009.

Hain returned to UCI as the head coach in 2015. In her five years, the team has made two post-season appearances, upset three nationally ranked teams and produced 17 all-conference selections. She was recently, named VolleyballMag.com Under 40 Coaching Hotshots.

Due to the pandemic, Hain now handles coaching duties from home while raising her two boys with husband Erik, who is in law enforcement.

"It is a busy, chaotic environment. Lincoln has kindergarten zoom class and Lucas is beginning to walk and get in to things. It's good that Lucas still needs to be on a schedule which helps me keep a schedule.

I miss my team more than ever. I think this will be a good thing when we come back because we will appreciate the time together and being in that environment. I've had to make calls in my car, there just isn't any space that's my own. Self-care is tough, but you just have to laugh and not take things too seriously to get through."

While team zoom calls include volleyball, the quarantine has given the staff an opportunity to spend time doing things that aren't always possible.

"The time has really given us the time to get to know the players on a deeper level as well as their background. We also have alums on once a week to talk about their experiences."

With weekends blending in to weekdays, what will Mother's Day look like?

"We will just spend the day together, maybe take a walk on the beach. My present actually came early so I opened it. It was a Mom frame with pictures of the boys that was so thoughtful of my husband. We really appreciate the time we are getting to be together."

Time together, whether at home or virtually, is at the heart of being a mom.

Happy Mother's Day!